Meeting Your Needs
It can be fairly obvious when our needs are not being met. But it can then be quite tricky to know the solution to this. Its much easier to see what another person’s needs are. Meeting your needs with the exercise will help you bring the language of your emotional self into your daily life.
Meet Your Needs With Emotional Grounding
Emotional grounding is a process of becoming aware of the range of emotions you have at any time. In noticing what you are feeling at the time you can begin to process these. In the process you can become empathetic towards yourself. You can soothe yourself. You can meet your needs by giving yourself exactly what you need at that time.
Understanding The Language Of Needs
So often the quest to meet our needs is one that is looking for a solution. Ahhhhh what do I need right now??? Well this technique and aims to help you see that meeting needs is about soothing our emotions.
The Emotional Grounding Technique
This is a paper based tool or worksheet to fill out. It is a process that you cover 3 specific phases of processing your emotions and feelings. The power that this technique will offer you will be perspective and self-empathy. Once you can identify the many feelings that are present you can begin to observe them. Once you are observing your feelings in an impartial way you begin to notice what you need.
Discovering what you need is not a solution or a fix. It’s understanding or a way of self-soothing. When you look at your emotional self you will most likely realise you just need to be told its ok. That it is ok to feel that way. You can offer yourself this comfort when you can genuinely listen.
The Emotional Grounding Technique allows you to listen, notice and self soothe all in a single process.
How To Work With This
Begin by filling out the worksheet and focus on Phase 1. Answer the question ” When I focus on_____ I feel”.
Write down as many emotions and feelings as you can notice within you. Even if they are conflicting. Especially if they are conflicting. This is where you honour all of the feelings and inner responses that you can. This is where you give a voice to each and every emotion and reaction that you can notice.
Once you have filled Phase one with all the feelings and emotions you can find, begin to question and ask with empathy.
Looking at these emotions I feel this person needs….
What is it like to be this person?
When I see this I need to….
How can I comfort this person….
What could you say to help this person understand them self ?
I feel the need to say….
Write down the answers to these questions in Phase 2 – these answers are your needs. These answers are what your emotional self is asking for.
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